SINGALONGA-SPAM!
or
What happens when people get very very bored at work!
This little lot came about when we received this virus warning from our
ever-helpful IT support people. Let those system support drums roll Dave..
From: David Tipping
Sent: 13 December 2001 10:09
To: All
Subject: Email
If you receive emails with any of the following subjects please delete them:
If I were God and didn't belive in myself would it be blasphemy
The A-Team VS KnightRider ... who would win ?
Just one kiss, will make it better. just one kiss, and we will be alright.
I can't help this longing, comfort me.
And I miss you most of all, my darling ...
... When autumn leaves start to fall
It's dark in here, you can feel it all around. The underground.
I will always be with you sometimes black sometimes white ...
.. and there's no need to be scared, you re always on my mind.
You just take a giant step, one step higher.
The air will hold you if you try, trust my wings of desire. Glory,
Glorified...
Now looking at the content of that lot, you might think that these subject
titles or email headers all look a little bit girly. On second thoughts,
they all look very very girly indeed. Also, they had accidentally combined
together all on their own, to form a strange kind of doggerel or bad poetry.
So a bit later on that day, my own twisted brain got to work, through the
alchemy of extreme boredom, leaving the text in its original form, but
rearranging the format into something that might work a bit better, or less
accidentally, at any rate. At that point, the idea of going from poetry, to
bad soft metal lyric lurched forward and tapped me on the shoulder, and you
can see the end result below..
From: Chris Holland
Sent: 13 December 2001 15:47
To: Nick Day; Vic Jennings; David Tipping
Subject: Bad lyrics from Email headers which are really Virus's (or Virii)
This list of email headers which are really viruses could be made into the
worst soft rock ballad in the world, do the words "Bon" and "Jovi" strike
any fear into your heart?!
Why not put on your tight ripped denims, freshly shampooed poodle perms, and
pick up those air guitars!
<-------------------------------------------------------------->
If I were God and didn't belive in myself would it be blasphemy
Just one kiss, will make it better. just one kiss, and we will be alright.
(Chorus)
You just take a giant step, one step higher.
The air will hold you if you try, trust my wings of desire. Glory,
Glorified...
I can't help this longing, comfort me.
And I miss you most of all, my darling ...
When autumn leaves start to fall
(Chorus)
You just take a giant step, one step higher.
The air will hold you if you try, trust my wings of desire. Glory,
Glorified...
It's dark in here, you can feel it all around. The underground.
I will always be with you sometimes black sometimes white ...
and there's no need to be scared, you re always on my mind.
(Chorus)
You just take a giant step, one step higher.
The air will hold you if you try, trust my wings of desire. Glory,
Glorified...
(Song ends, much cheering, and gentle thumping sounds of small children
hitting the ceiling as they are hurled skyward by ecstatic parents..)
Not quite sure where this would go in though?
- The A-Team VS KnightRider ... who would win ?
Now wouldn't those make great lyrics for some really nasty and slushy soft
rock ballad style beer commercial music!
So, how plausible would that be to you, people called Bryan Adams might well
say "very". In which case, we'll be watching you extremely closely, for any
attempts at 'borrowing' or copyright infringement, you naughty Canadian faux
rocker, you!
Can any of you do any better with that sort of material? Ever tried putting
together a story, poem, or song, purely made out of email headers with
peculiar subject titles? Fancy doing one for the next issue of Alive! mag?
Let's see your efforts for next time folks!
CiH - Dec '01
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